For years friends expressed amazement that I had never watched "Nip/Tuck tv show" -- just my kind of show, they insisted. And so, spurred by the recent assault of pre-season publicity, I decided to pay a first-time visit to Nip/Tuck dvd last night. I was expecting sly and witty satire. What I found instead (in repeat episodes that focused on a serial mangler and a deranged racist) was a puerile, unrelenting torrent of violence and sadism. Robotic and/or hysterical acting, moronic plot contortions, and enough deep shadow (in Miami, yet) to make Edgar Ulmer spin like a top. It was like watching Joel Schumacher direct Ricky Martin as Hannibal Lecter. Nice to know what my friends think of my taste.